haiz... blessing? or misfortune?
Today is a day filled with unexpected event... haiz... It all started at lab today....
Today's lab was mainly for project --> i.e. we devise our own experiment, carry it out, see thru more or less everything under limited supervision. Well, the group was unexpectedly large... six... but that wasnt the main pt... the main thing was that a group leader need to be appointed and I got appointed... zzzz... i have been trying so hard to reject any major leadership required post and there i got it... well this is nothing much tho, i realise later that i was also shortlisted for LDP(leadership development programme)... i would really like to go.. however, i couldnt find a way to cope even if i do, judging from the fact that i need to stay hall, which means i need to take sufficient CCA to get my points... LDP basically is extremely time consuming and doesnt give any CCA pts.
But a side note abt LDP, it is a programme which aims to develop the leadership potential of individual who managed to get in ( i was shortlisted only, which means even if i tried, i might have been rejected during the interview >.<). The activities range from special electives available mainly to LDP members, mentoring sessions, seminars, outdoor activities, etc....
Honestly speaking, i really wan to try to go for it.. but i wouldnt take the risk as i am very worried currently over my academic status... i might sounds like i am over worrying, which might be true... but i cant help feeling rather unconfident to excel in everything, especially the fact that the Design Stream i am in is generally more demanding than the mainstream (subjective) and that the competitiveness level is much higher... i worry that my results will be bad when pitted against ppl of those calibre.. sigh
but i guess it cant be help, and that i am indeed worrying too much.. since when did i became such a worrier =X
luckily i managed to get quite a bit of consolation from my dear, she pei me out for dinner and i pour out all this junk thots of mine.. felt better after that and at the same time realise that i am worrying a bit too much as more than half the modules i take will be concurrent with the mainstream students and all i have to do is to excel in all these and try to maintain a reasonably good results for the rest of my design subject and my 2nd upper honours is still achievable (haha i dun think i can hit 1st class.. so contented with 2nd upper... =X)
hmm, but seriously, i think i am letting a golden opportunity slip... haiz... i guess life is meant to be liddat... opportunities slip sometimes not due to our indecisiveness or incompetency, rather, it can be becuz situation doesnt allow us to grab it... perhaps i am too conservative... i am not willing to risk everything for this experience... but since i choose to do that, i shd follow through till the end......
Today's lab was mainly for project --> i.e. we devise our own experiment, carry it out, see thru more or less everything under limited supervision. Well, the group was unexpectedly large... six... but that wasnt the main pt... the main thing was that a group leader need to be appointed and I got appointed... zzzz... i have been trying so hard to reject any major leadership required post and there i got it... well this is nothing much tho, i realise later that i was also shortlisted for LDP(leadership development programme)... i would really like to go.. however, i couldnt find a way to cope even if i do, judging from the fact that i need to stay hall, which means i need to take sufficient CCA to get my points... LDP basically is extremely time consuming and doesnt give any CCA pts.
But a side note abt LDP, it is a programme which aims to develop the leadership potential of individual who managed to get in ( i was shortlisted only, which means even if i tried, i might have been rejected during the interview >.<). The activities range from special electives available mainly to LDP members, mentoring sessions, seminars, outdoor activities, etc....
Honestly speaking, i really wan to try to go for it.. but i wouldnt take the risk as i am very worried currently over my academic status... i might sounds like i am over worrying, which might be true... but i cant help feeling rather unconfident to excel in everything, especially the fact that the Design Stream i am in is generally more demanding than the mainstream (subjective) and that the competitiveness level is much higher... i worry that my results will be bad when pitted against ppl of those calibre.. sigh
but i guess it cant be help, and that i am indeed worrying too much.. since when did i became such a worrier =X
luckily i managed to get quite a bit of consolation from my dear, she pei me out for dinner and i pour out all this junk thots of mine.. felt better after that and at the same time realise that i am worrying a bit too much as more than half the modules i take will be concurrent with the mainstream students and all i have to do is to excel in all these and try to maintain a reasonably good results for the rest of my design subject and my 2nd upper honours is still achievable (haha i dun think i can hit 1st class.. so contented with 2nd upper... =X)
hmm, but seriously, i think i am letting a golden opportunity slip... haiz... i guess life is meant to be liddat... opportunities slip sometimes not due to our indecisiveness or incompetency, rather, it can be becuz situation doesnt allow us to grab it... perhaps i am too conservative... i am not willing to risk everything for this experience... but since i choose to do that, i shd follow through till the end......
posted by sLeePy HeaD @ 10:36 PM
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